golf at the hague

Page

SETTING: a southern bed&breakfast community.
PLOT: an unfortunate surprise casts doubt on peace!
TIME: 2003

SCENE 1
common person 1: “I paid my bills.”
cp 2: “I got Mexicans to cut my grass.”
cp 1: “good.”
cp 2: “what are you doing.”
cp 1: “look who just came in.”
cp 3: “hey.”
cp 1: “where you been.”
cp 4: “I am married.”
cp 5: “where’s who been.”
cp 1: “yep.”

SCENE 2
cp 3: “hey.”
wife 3: “the neighbor’s yard looks nice.”
cp 3: “Mexicans do a good job.”
wf 3: “yep.”
wf 3: “help me with this crossword puzzle?”
cp 3: “uh-huh.”
wf 3: “no, look at 4 across …”
cp 3: “all right, maybe ‘turpentine’ then.”
wf 3: “uh-uh.”

SCENE 3
cp 3: “when is the golf program?”
wf 3: “it comes on in a minute, be a little more patient.”
cp 3: “all right.”

SCENE 4
boss 1: “good morning, Joe.”
cp 1: “mornin’ Ralph.”
bo 1: “good morning, Ken.”
cp 3: “morning Ralph.”
cp 1: “did you watch the golf program.”
cp 3: “I did.”
cp 1: “me too.”
cp 3: “I am going to dinner tonight.”
cp 1: “with your wife.”
cp 3: “yeah.”

SCENE 5
valet 1: “hello.”
cp 3: “thank you.”
vl 1: “your wife looks lovely, sir.”
cp 3: “yes, you’re a gentleman”, handing valet 1 $5.
vl 1: “enjoy your dinner, sir.”
wf 3: “did you give the valet his tip.”
cp 3: “yes.”
maitre d 1: “what?”
cp 3: “table for 2.”
md 1: “right this way.”
… a minute later …
md 1: “may I get your chair madam.”
wf 3: “that’s fine.”
wf 3: “what are going to eat.”
cp 3: “soup.”
wf 3: “that sounds good.”
cp 3: “what are going to eat.”
wf 3: “soup.”
cp 3: “that sounds good.”
wf 3: “I like the music.”
cp 3: “pianos are pretty.”

SCENE 6
wf 3: “turn out the lights.”
cp 3: “good night dear.”
wf 3: “good night.”
… several hours later …
zoological monster 1: enters the house 3 through front door ( off stage ).
hs 3: shakes slightly
cp 3: sleeps soundly
zm 1: advances toward bedroom
hs 3: shakes slightly more
zm 1: advances closer to bedroom
cp 3: feels the bed shaking a bit
zm 1: enters the hallway area towards bedroom
hs 3: shakes very much near bedroom
zm 1: “ahhuuhh-ehh, hhuuuu-ehh-hnhnhnhn, uhhuu”, loudly at bedroom entrance
wf 3: opens eyes
zm 1: grunting, thudding gait, steps forward
zm 1: crosses dark bedroom threshold
cp 3: very concerned
wf 3: also very concerned
zm 1: proceeds along cp 3‘s bedside
zm 1: turns beyond cp 3‘s side of footboard
zm 1: proceeds beyond, parallel to footboard
hs 1: bedroom is destructively rattling
wf 3: can’t believe it
zm 1: crashes through window, destroying much of window frame
hs 1: window glass shatters outward, downward from the second floor window
zm 1: exits bedroom with shards of glass and wall portions
zm 1: lands undaunted in yard beneath window
cp 3: gets out of bed, quick steps to remains of window
cp 3: “its running through the neighbors yard.”
wf 3: joins husband at window
zm 1: moves into a distant darkness
cp 3: calls inurance company and emergency serveices
for several hours there are many investigators examining the scene

SCENE 7
wf 3: “are you going to have breakfast.”
cp 3: “yes.”
wf 3: “what do you want.”
cp 3: “toast, eggs.”
wf 3: “ok.”

SCENE 8
bo 1: “good morning, Joe.”
cp 1: “mornin’ Ralph.”
bo 1: “good morning, Ken.”

cp 3: “morning Ralph.”
cp 1: “how was dinner, Ken.”
cp 3: “it was good.”
cp 3: “did you get the files ready.”
cp 1: “yes.”
cp 3: “good.”

SCENE 9
cp 1: “hello.”
cp 4: “good to see you.”
cp 1: “when did you get the shoes.”
cp 2: “yesterday.”
cp 1: “good.”
cp 4: “have a good evening everybody.”

SCENE 10
wf 4: “dinner’s on the table.”
cp 4: “I am hungry.”
wf 4: “do you like pesto.”
cp 4: “it’s good.”
wf 4: “ok.”
wf 4: “drink your orange juice.”
cp 4: “I will.”

SCENE 11
cp 3: “golf is on.”
wf 3: “my hands are full.”
cp 3: “I am watching golf.”
wf 3: “here’s the wine.”
cp 3: “where’s the pimento.”
wf 3: “I have to make separate trips.”
cp 3: “ok”
wf 3: “here’s the pimento.”
cp 3: “ok.”

SCENE 12
cp 3: “I am thinking about buying a boat.”
cp 2: “boats are nice.”
cp 3: “I looked in the newspaper.”
cp 2: “classified ads?”
cp 3: “yes.”
cp 2: “all right.”
cp 4: “how much.”

curtain down

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